funny conversations

N, (3.5), today in the post office line --

"I need all the dead batteries we can find. I will give them to my workers, and they'll put them in the dead battery machine and we'll make money. We need money to buy stuff, you know? It's a big machine" (insert grand arm movements here) "and there's a huge cruncher part" (insert hands doing crunching movement) "and then there's a little door where the money shoots out. And one my workers stands there with a bucket to catch all the money."

I have NO idea why he thinks dead batteries can turn into money. He understands coins are metal, and batteries are metal, and must have decided that batteries make money?

C, (5), last night, before bed --

"Well, I have something serious to tell you. I don't want to be a firefighter anymore." (shakes head sadly) "Because everyone has fears and I realize I have this fear of going into a burning building. So, obviously," (insert big hand movements) "I can't be a firefighter. I will just have to be a tow truck driver. But, I can still be a palentologist, right, even while I'm driving tow trucks? There is no fear problem with driving a tow truck."

I tried to explain that everyone has fears, and that I'm sure firefighters are afraid every time they go into a burning building. I tried to explain courage and bravery -- but he has decided that he has to give up that dream. And, if you think I am making up the words or sentence structure - let me assure you I'm not.